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"an early goodbye"  08-18-07

To go before your time is a far too common honor
If that's my role, at least I did all I ever wanted.
You loved me, I loved her, we loved every minute
I was always the person that was meant to be
and was until I left this planet.
If I left a mark, If I made a dent
to me it was all worth it, every second fucking spent.

Izzy... 

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untitled.  08-18-07

Broken wings seem to be the things we always try to fly with
The lies I speak, I'll take with me, they'll be the ones I die with
Sooner or later, I don't know?
Heaven or hell, where will I go?
Life and limb, I sacrifice
too many times I've rolled the dice
too many feelings I've gotten involved
way too many mysteries that have now been solved
is forgiveness written?
I hope so...
will love be forever?
Close your eyes, go to sleep
maybe tomorrow we'll know...

Izzy... 

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"Like Him"   03-05-07   

If I could only be like him, that would be great
but I'm me instead...that I hate..
To be so colorful, so visually charismatic,
to live so freely. When I met him I was ecstatic
but he is just like me, his poem told it so
if he could see me now, if only he could know
how far I've come, who he inspired me to be 
he'd say "that kid in the crowd turned out to be just like me"
and I'd say "thank you for the biggest compliment of all"
2 crazy people existing to inspire and that's wonderful.
2 forms of entertainment living the dream
putting our hearts on the line just to hear them scream.
If I could only be like him, I'd be a mess...
God save the reckless, save us both from this madness

Izzy... 

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 "Hurt"       01-22-07         

At a loss for words...
With a gain of hurt.
You've caught your dreams,
what could be worse..?
Than you fucking it up and fuck yourself
Out of all worked for, there's nothing left
Watched myself slip....
Just let it slide...
Waited in the wrong line...
Now all I got was a short ride.
Don't know what to do,
Temptation from all directions
when left up to me....
Never make the right decision.
So bottoms up as dreams crash down
Fallen in my dream...finally hit the ground.

Izzy... 

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C. K  Decade    9-10-06     

Hi..................I did it 

I couldn't have done it if the picture didn't have you in it.. 

your long gone now, but I'm telling you now 

"I did it my love, thank you" (take a bow) 

it still feels strange and foreign to write your name and think of you from time to time, 

but when I do I smile cuz after all this time all I can remember are the good times.. 

Inspiration, faith, dreams, and true love. 

At 13 we never could have dreamed in 10 years what would come. 

You were there at the start, unfortunately not at the end.. 

it's really a shame we couldn't share it, you were still my best girlfriend, 

so your not anymore, and haven't been for awhile 

but if you ever read this....I did it for us and I hope it makes you smile.. X-)

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"Flash back/forward (I know your agenda mother fucker)"   October 5, 2006

18 years old and a star to be... 

5 years later a pitiful scene 

lost in too many things 

finally hit the floor of your dreams. 

So here I am, in control of my own 

the only downer is waking up alone 

sick of the routine, these everyday habits.. 

I'm not using my heart.. here, you can have it, 

my dreams too, my money and fame. 

take my whole identity, my life and my name! 

sex, drugs, and rock n roll.. all I ever wanted.. 

is it worth what I've sold? is it worth being haunted? 

especially by the same demons day after day 

so much has changed since "I want it that way". 

And today I wear a broken heart on my chest so honestly

as I'm phading away from all that is beautiful 

I hate that I can't love you, but my life is wonderful?! 

I hope for a new song, one that I'll love 

but I've lost my patience and sacrificed too much 

If I saw what I've seen at 15 

I never could've handled it. It would've crushed me. 

so the bottom line is, any reality to a fantasy is fake..

corrupted by nothing but greed, evil, and hate. 

But please still chase your dreams.. I insist! 

cuz once your there, (under any circumstances) ..you wont resist! 

but then the complexes are growing and now it's showing. 

You'll never see things the way I do (poor me) 

Not like you, I'm alone in the crowd (poor me) 

while your too fucked up to be honest, too scared to lose in any contest  in a 1 on 1. 

so instead you have your cerebral fun 

in conclusion, all you see if half of what you'll get, 

that's when you find yourself writing a poem in a question of regret.. 

while I hate how everything must be your way.. 

I HATE YOU and your name rhymes with everything you are.. _ _ _..

Izzy...

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"quintuple jeopardy"  18/8/06   

The culmination of everything meant to be, coming to fruition 

The end of all questions and answers as fate makes its final decision  

and you will be there to witness the outcome 

You will see the rise and fall and what becomes 

Holding my last breath, safe inside myself 

Holding onto my dreams, sanity, and health, 

but all in the risk of slipping away, falling out of sight 

In the near of fear, trapped in the gray area between wrong and right 

For the first time with no solution to offer. running blind 

I blaze the trail to a place I can't seem to find...

Izzy...

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"Path far from here (pyro)"  24/7/06 

Submersion of dreams
Your in my unconscious themes
I'm sorry, I have to say it, but you look like my cure
I want to know how it is to kiss you. I've dreamt its true but I want to
make sure
but this is my remained secret, BLACK as night
Hidden and disguised as friendship, contained feelings at each sight.
Blinded each time by the beauty of your character
There's so much I want to, that I'll never share with her

Izzy...=

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"Mine is ours"   24\7\06  

5:36am 

See 1, or see 2..                                    

Believe just like I do
The day comes and the day goes
You'll never change cuz its the life that you chose..
So hate it and live it, love it or leave it
Curse it or sin it, thank and believe it.
Remember what you came from, break away..
No matter what remember only you can own today.
So see 3 or see 4..see 69 more
Believe just like I do
Your the reason I'm here for

Izzy...

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"Basterds 2"   7-22-06  

                        
3am, disconnected, alone and again
Don't listen to me
Either way you'll never understand
I'm the last thing on your mind
You'll never know me, cuz myself I can't find
And its ok, cuz I've adapted..
Or have I? Maybe I'm just pretendin
Go here, say that...
Even if you don't feel it "DO THAT!!"
But I love you, that's why I fold
Made a bitch and do what I'm told.
I'll never lie and never hold back anything
If you want the truth, I'm a basterdized version of the real
Izzy...............

enjoy???
Izzy...=

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"Basterds"  6-15-06

Its about time, not to shine but to die
As your tangled up and choke on your lies
In a world where "I'm sorry" just won't cut it
Now everyone must pick up the pieces cuz YOU fucked it
YOU broke it, its come to an end
Living a ruined life, thank you my friend
Saw it coming from a mile away
Like a deer caught in headlights, like an idiot I stayed
Now I'm def, mute, crippled in fear
Stuck and can't go anywhere but here
With an open wound and nothing you can do
How about having your cake and choking on it too?
Couldn't look at the sun before, was too bright
Now I stare for hours and the ends in sight
And now its time, not to shine but to die
And your left with your beginning question.....why??
Izzy...

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